This morning’s run was average. Nothing good… Nothing bad…
I felt physically better than most days but just have this little bit of a grey cloud hovering over my head… Don’t know why… Just feeling low…
Its funny because work has actually been taking my mind off of things and that’s why I want to keep working until I’m ready to go to the hospital. I don’t see the need to stop.
I’m trying to catch myself at certain moments… Trying not to say things I don’t mean or snap at people who walk into the subway too slow (what the FUCK is wrong with those people by the way… I mean – once u ENTER the train it doesn’t mean that the people behind u disappear!)
So… We have another growth scan that was scheduled a little early so that my OB can track the growth of her head. The last measurements came in at the 6th percentile and.. What the fuck does that mean? I have no idea. Small hats? Small brain?
I tried not to worry about it but tomorrow is our next growth scan and I’m scared… What if her head is too small? What does that MEAN???